Creating ​​Rewards for Effective Discipline

Scarcity drives value. This fundamental principle is the lynchpin of our entire economic system. You can see ​it at work everywhere, from the price of gold to the price of milk. The brilliant thing is this same principle can be adapted to develop a series of rewards that will give your teen the incentive to follow the rules.

What do teens want? Well, broadly speaking, they want more freedom. Freedom to come and go when and how they please. Freedom to enjoy the latest electronic games and gadgets. Freedom to text and chat with their friends.

All these privileges have one thing in common: you. As a parent or guardian of a teen, you are the one who holds the key to all of these. As such, you are in the position to dole out these privileges as rewards for your teen's good behavior.

The best part of these prized privileges? They're free!

You don't have to bribe your teen with money or promise to buy him or her a new video game or pair of jeans. You simply create a batch of rewards that can be given out whenever your teen earns them.

Your son brings home an impressive report card? Maybe he gets to stay out an extra half hour every night next week. Your daughter cleans her room without prompting? Maybe she gets an extra half hour of chat time with her friends after supper.

You needn't stop there. Survey your home for other things your teen desires - TV time, sleeping in late on weekend mornings, etc. - the only limit is your imagination.

And, as we have mentioned before, it's important to "catch your teen being good." That means, you shouldn't just give out expected rewards for expected achievements (e.g. your son knows if he passes his calculus test, he'll get an extra half hour of video game time); you should also give out unexpected rewards. For instance, your daughter took her little sister to the park, giving you some much-needed downtime. You could say, "You know, I really appreciated you taking your sister to the park the other day. Tonight, instead of helping with dishes, you can FaceTime with your friends for half an hour."

It should be mentioned, of course, that while we're talking about rewards here, you are also in the position to take away privileges as consequences for negative behavior. Meaning that if your son bombs the aforementioned calculus test, not only does he lose that half hour of gaming time, he also loses his video game privileges for a week.

The bottom line is you are in charge and hold the key to the freedoms and privileges teens cherish most.