We are so glad you are reaching out for help with this issue. Sometimes youth don't want to talk about the way they feel because they don't have the words to express the thoughts or feelings they are having. Grief is one of those emotions where there isn't a “right" or “wrong" way to express it.
Does your daughter seem affected by this family friend's death or does it not really interrupt her daily functioning? If she connects with Boys Town's Your Life Your Voice webpages (at YLYV.org), she can access coping skills to help her get through the difficult moments and/or speak to a Crisis Counselor (if/when needed) through text, phone or email any time day or night. There are also several short articles on grief located in the tips and tools section. This website was created for teens and young adults to help them handle the assorted issues that affect them during these often difficult years. Again, the website is YLYV.org. Feel free to suggest it to your daughter if she is struggling with this event or her own feelings. We do not judge anyone who contacts us or tell people how they should feel. Instead, we are there to have conversations about anything the youth or young adults want to problem solve.
One way to possibly get your daughter to open up and talk with you is to ask her to check out a website (YLYV.org) you recently heard about and then just allow her to explore and express her thoughts and feelings on it. Keeping communication flowing without the “should" or “would" type words attached to the emotions allows kids to state their thoughts and feeling during the moment and connect with you without feeling any type of judgement. Give it a try and see if it helps!
