Getting Daughter to Try Harder In School

Hi, I have a 10 year old girl who is very lazy when comes to school work. She is intelligent but very relax and not worried about her falling grades. Her teachers say she can do better but she is not trying hard enough. How can I help her after rewarding her and explaining to her why she has to study?

Thank you for contacting us for suggestions to help your daughter. When children do not work to the best of their ability in school it can be very frustrating to their parents. It sounds as though this could be a "motivation" problem although we can't be sure.

If she still gets all of her privileges such as TV, phone, playing in her room or outdoors or with friends, listening to music and having sweet snacks even though her grades are failing, she will probably not change. If she has to earn these privileges by having acceptable grades, she will be more motivated to improve those grades.

At a neutral time have a conversation with your daughter about the unacceptable grades and what you and mother have decided to implement. Share the plan, let her know the benefits of doing it this new way. Also let her know what will happen if she does not.

The other cause could be peer pressure. Yes, even at her age there could be a peer group that makes fun of
students who excel academically and they even think it is cool to fail subjects.

Keep your communication open with her teacher to gather more specific information. Perhaps having her observed in the classroom would shed some light on the problem.


Good luck and stay in touch,
Pat, Crisis Counselor

< Return to List