Son Sreaming At His Younger Brother

I need help with my middle son and my youngest. My question is, how do I get my middle son to quit screaming whenever the youngest goes around him?

It's great that you are seeking parenting help for your son that is screaming. It can be very frustrating to hear that response and you may feel helpless . You are right to want to stop the screaming because it is not an acceptable response to his younger sibling.

The challenge is to try and understand your 3 year old but not let him manipulate you. First be very clear with him about what you expect of him. Pre-teach him and demonstrate to him the indoor and respectful voice you want him to use when his younger brother comes around. During a calm time, practice with him so he can know the voice you expect him to use with his younger brother. Then let him know what will happen when/if he yells and screams...i.e. a 3 min. timeout. Then "catch him being good" whenever he is communicating with the volume you want, tell him. Say something like, "That's it, you are talking/communicating in a voice that is kind and now I can hear what you are saying. Good job!" They say that children learn from hearing what they are doing correct. I'm sure you praise him a lot and you want to keep it up so that he will continue to want to have the positive feelings he get's from mom telling how what he did right.

Something to think about is, what is the issue behind his screaming? Is he frustrated about something? Remain sympathetic but strong in your teaching and consequences. If you want to check out our book, Common Sense Parenting for Toddlers, go to http://www.boystownpress.org/Scripts/prodList.asp.

We also have a 24 hour crisis line, so you can call to talk in more detail. Thanks for contacting us and we hope this information helps you and your family.

Sincerely,
Diana

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