Young Child Has Abandonment Issues

I have a grandchild with abandonment issues. Cries a lot. Mother had nervous breakdown and father had to take custody. They were taken from the mother by protective child services. Their father is my son and they stay with me and him for now. Can 2 1/2 year olds have emotional problems?

Thank you for reaching out and contacting our Hotline tonight. First of all, I respect your commitment to your grand children. It is not an easy task to help with parenting grand children, but with the right support and guidance hopefully it will make it less stressful.

Yes, young children and even infants can have emotional problems. Children reflect what it going on in the environment around them. They do not know how to express their feelings with their words, so it comes out in their behaviors. Crying is actually a healthy sign that he is attached to his mother.

Does your grandson have any contact or visitations with his mother? Is the plan for his mother to share custody once she is well and doing better? Separation from the mother is a traumatic experience for a young child. What your grandchild may be feeling is a sense of loss, which can be likened to the grieving process. Allow your grand son to cry and understand that he may "regress" in some areas such as toilet training or dressing himself. Hold him and assure him that he is safe and loved. Tell him that his mommy loves him very much, and although she is not feeling well and can't take care of him right now, that she will come back when she is all better. Keep a photo of your daughter-in-law on a table or shelf so he can look at it when he wants.

If you would like us to send you parenting information or find you services in your local area, please write back with your city and state, or you can call and speak with one of our crisis counselors. We are here for parents and grand parents, 24 hours, 7 days a week. Take care and hope to hear from you soon!

Sincerely,
Cynthia, Hotline Crisis Counselor

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