Fathers, Come Home

A Wake-up Call for Busy Dads

By Bill Swindell

In his book, Fathers, Come Home, Bill Swindell relates his journey from being a father with a busy, career-centered life to one who is recommitted to his wife and children.  The book is a gentle and heartwarming reminder to dads of the responsibilities and joys of fatherhood.

“The best part about writing the book was talking with and observing other fathers with their kids and trying to sort out the lessons, good and bad, that would apply to me,” said Swindell.

Writing the book was not all peaches and cream.  “The hardest thing was opening up the most vulnerable part of your life for others to see,” said Swindell.  “Looking at my children each day and thinking about how many of the important ‘little things’ I had missed in the earlier years and thinking about how, collectively, those ‘little things’ could become ‘big things.’”

Prior to writing the book, Swindell led a career-centered life, trying to balance work and family.  However, work was getting the best of him.  “Some of the time, I was working internationally and would be gone as many as three to four weeks at a time,” said Swindell.  “When in the U.S., I would leave very early for work at 6 a.m. and return around 7 p.m.  The majority of the waking hours were spent away from the family.”

While working, Swindell was truly missing some of the best memories that a father can make with his family.  “I missed out on one-on-one time with the children, such as playing at the park, hiking, fishing, helping with homework and school projects,” said Swindell.  “Also, youth activities such as soccer, softball, school plays, social events at church and even some award ceremonies where my children were being recognized.”

Swindell realized that he needed to do something to win back his family time.  And things began to change.  “After writing the book, I looked for every opportunity to spend time with my family, even if it was just a few minutes to read a story book or take a walk around the block and let them tell me about their day,” he said.  “I no longer worked after hours unless it was absolutely essential.  I did not volunteer to take any assignments that would take me away from home for extended periods of time.  Family vacations were an important part of our planning.”

Swindell also decided that he did not want to miss out on anymore on even the smallest events.  “The great things actually are the things that may be perceived as small things,” he said.  “My oldest daughter (now an attorney) was active in speech and debate.  I became very involved as a volunteer dad.  My youngest was just getting into gymnastics.  I became a regular ‘gym dad,’ which, I guess, is like a ‘soccer mom.’  School events (sports, award ceremonies, elementary and junior high graduations, etc.) took higher priority.  We made our house a place where other kids wanted to come so that we could be closer to our own kids.”

Has Swindell changed?  Definitely.  He is putting other things besides work first in his life.  “Now, my priorities are my family (wife, daughters, sons-in-law and grandchildren), our spiritual moorings, our health and my work at Boys Town,” he said.  “Though my family may have been skeptical at first, I think over the years they were pleased to know I had a deeper commitment to them.  This has been a great blessing to me.”

In offering his thoughts on why it is important to take time for family, Swindell says it comes down to sharing simple life experiences.  “After many years, it will not be the big things in life that our children remember about us, but the little ones such as the time we took to read to them, take a walk or play catch in the backyard,” he said.  “It is these memories that will carry them for a lifetime.”

Buy the book, Fathers, Come Home

Back to Books, DVDs & More!