August is here, and for many of us that means one thing: back to school shopping! All around town, families are hitting the mall, searching for that perfect look (namely, something stylish that pleases both parent and kid).

Addressing dressing can be particularly tough for Moms and adolescent daughters. What your teen wants (and will tell you everyone is wearing) may not be what you know is appropriate, or even up to school dress code. So, how do you avoid the great clothing wars?

Here are some quick tips for helping your daughter look and be her best:

1. First and foremost, stress that you want her to be able to express herself without losing her sense of dignity.
   
2. Check over your school dress code carefully, and review it with your daughter before you shop. Point out that school is her “job” for now, and she needs to dress to facilitate learning, not distract from it.
   
3. Talk with her about family clothing rules. Be specific about what’s okay and what’s not (for example, no underwear showing, spaghetti straps, bare midriffs, short skirts, belly button rings or pajamas worn to school).
   
4. Encourage her to choose fabrics and colors but don’t compromise your rules.
   
5. Set a budget and stick to it – the marketers are out in force at this time of year, and it’s a great opportunity to help teens learn about responsible spending.

Remember, clothing is an important part of a kid’s identity. Teen girls both want and need to discover who they are. Remind your daughter that modesty is never out of style for women with confidence and self-respect. To quote Wendy Shalit, author of A Return to Modesty, “Modesty is usually a reflection of self-worth, of having such a high opinion of yourself that you don’t need to boast or put your body on display for all to see…